A Valued Employee Speaks
December 21, 2016 - Uncategorized - 0 Comments
My parents divorced when I was three; my mother’s drug addiction was out of control and her cheating and lies ended the marriage. In my mom’s custody my two brothers and I were starved, undernourished, abused, neglected, ect. we had only each other. My nightmare continued until age 11 that’s when my father set a case in court and regained custody of us 3 and he was remarried however my heart and mind was shattered beyond repair. Starting at the age of 16 I ran away began experiencing endless days and nights of using and drinking which almost cost me my life many of times. I was so wrapped up in darkness losing myself along the way of my morals and values. I remember saying I was willing to die for my addiction after all I fell in love the first time I tried it. While committing crimes with my homies and living life on the edge I felt so alone even in a crowd people.
My goals and dreams went up in smoke in my glass pipe and my pain was numbed monetarily and once again I felt those steel claps gripping on my wrists with my freedom being stripped away due too poor choices. I wondered if those cops might have been angels saving me not only from my disease of addiction but myself. A few times I remember being secretly happy to be arrested to get away from all the chaos on the streets for a minute. Each time I faced the judge my stakes got higher with longer sentences from juvenile hall to jail then eventually I graduated to the “big house.” So many nights my family members prayed for me and cried wondering if they would receive the call that I was dead.
I felt so guilty and ashamed and helpless running back to those connections each time I was released. My addiction held me in bondage and I was unwilling to change. In 2006 my real mother was murdered in her addiction however this did not stop me in mine -although I attempted to end my life; only to be rescued and eventually arrested once again. I began to realize that change needed to happen within me and not with anyone else. I was getting much older and my situation was played out and finally on my last prison stay I built my foundation on God and meant it; upon my release the changes I made were positive choices it was amazing looking back now how it all in folded since 2008.
The people I trusted were utilizing my place as a drug spot I discovered after from my release from prison. So I chose to go homeless; upon arriving their; I met a man whom is now my husband however at the time he had taught me and showed me about 12 step meetings the first night we met and I remained clean and sober attending 12 step meetings around that corner from shelter, getting up at 4 am mandatory and sleep by 10 pm, standing in food lines, helping out in laundry section to earn a spot in the back bed area. I grabbed onto a sponsor and I completed my 12 steps, and attended church. More healthy opportunities came my way to move on from that area and I went to college for this career and graduated and have I upgraded my credentials since then I relied on my faith and my courage and recovery process after all I’m convinced that God didn’t bring me this far to let me go now after all I survived.
I have been blessed to have a career opportunity that has been an ongoing experience at His House New Creation where my passion for this company utterly speaks volumes. I love everything it stands for and how it became to be, and the people involved behind the scenes. My boss, program manager, and other coworkers and I have that beautiful opportunity to help save lives and empower others, and it’s a family like environment. I main speak, go on panels, have a commitment, have sponsees, and most of all the people in my life are phenomenal including my loving husband who is also 8 years clean my family that I was estranged from are involved in my life. My work experience has been so amazing and opportunities never cease. I never forget where I came from or the people who were there for me at my lowest points when I had nothing to offer but myself. I wake up each day thanking God for all my blessings without a pipe or bottle in my mouth and for my 8 years of recovery and my gratitude overflows for another chance at life living the program and no longer just existing.
A Grateful Employee of Her House